Work-life fail

Work-life fail

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Today was tough. Nothing about it was especially hard, but it was tough all the same. All of my patients are alive and well, and I FINALLY caught up on all my charts for the week (and a few from last week). I didn’t have to put any animals to sleep, and even had a pretty critical case turn out wonderfully. Still, it was tough. Today, the veterinarian had a great day, but the mommy failed miserably.

Today, the (career girl) had a great day, but the mommy failed miserably.

I woke long before the sun with my 8-month-old. I spent some quality time (packing the toddler’s lunch, letting the dogs out, feeding the dogs, changing diapers) with him before Daddy and the 3-year-old woke up an hour and a half later. Daddy parted with kisses and hugs for all, and I got to spend a half hour with both kids (breakfast, getting dressed, toddler bathroom routine) before the nanny arrived and it was time to leave for work.

We weren’t especially busy today, but busy enough to have to work through lunch (again), and long into the afternoon. Even after the office closed at 6 pm, all the other employees clocked out and locked me in, and the phones were silenced for the night. I saw my last patient for the day at about 5:40 pm, made a few phone calls (all positive news, yay!), then settled down to catch up on writing in files. Finally, after 7pm, I finished my last chart, locked up and headed home after a 10.5 hour day.

My amazing husband had already cooked dinner and fed the kids, and they were all cuddled on the couch watching Moana. It was 7:30 by now, and getting close to bedtime. I nursed my son as I ate my cold dinner and comforted my daughter (her tummy was hurting).

Within an hour of my arrival, she was ready for bed. My son was asleep in my arms. He woke when I rose from the couch to (God forbid) use the bathroom. I brought him with me anyway. Then I handed him off and headed upstairs with my daughter. We started our bedtime routine, then the baby joined us, and they were both asleep just after 9 pm.

Even rising early with the boy, I only managed to get in four hours with him today. Three  hours with my daughter, who actually understands a bit. I know that’s probably more than a lot of working moms get, and most days I’m pretty good at counting my blessings. But, today it was tough. Today, I failed. Work won, and my family suffered for it. They won’t remember, but I will.

I read a quote by Annabel Crabb a while back that struck a chord with me. She said “The obligation for working mothers is a very precise one: the feeling that one ought to work as if one did not have children, while raising one’s children as if one did not have a job.” This. Is. So. True.

Tomorrow, I’ll do better. Tomorrow, I’ll be present. Tomorrow, I’ll be MOM.



4 Replies to “Work-life fail”

  1. Everybody is failing at something every day. I have 7 kids so even though I am at home and just bligging a great day with one kid mightbe a major fail with another.

  2. Sweet girl, thank you for this post. I am a newlywed — no kids yet, but very busy at work. A usual day is 9 or 10 hours, sometimes 12 or 13. Anyway, it sounds like you are doing a wonderful job all around, although I know it must be hard. This is your encouragement to keep going!

    1. Thank you! And congratulations to you! I used to work longer hours before kids, too. But it shouldn’t be that way! We all have to learn to set boundaries so that our loved ones don’t suffer for it, and we don’t get burnt out. It’s just as important for you to take time to be with your husband. Thank you for the kind words.

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